And so there I was on my first day out of America, without any concept
of what I had gotten myself into. Fuzhou China, 2005, children in camouflage
marching in lines. Serving in the military: a mandatory contribution to a
government that all children are too young to understand. All you could do was
stand there, look, and stand some more. How does one raised in democracy
ever make this alright in their mind? Kids flying to service camps when kids
should be outside flying kites. This image, in my head for life, struck me
as a perfect portrait of a culture harsh and cold. On that day, standing
there, I thought my impression of the people of Fuzhou would remain harsh and
cold. It didn't.
I was 21, fresh and in a new culture that I yearned to understand. As a
teacher in a new land I anticipated change, I expected give and take and a
cross-cultural understanding. Teaching was completely new to me and lets face
it, what did this white Anglo-Saxon, blonde haired, blue eyed, just out of
college, 20 something, female know about teaching in China? Nothing. First
day, I was a strange girl in a strange land standing up in front of a class of
eyes that looked at the floor and mouths that said nothing for 5 hours. I
had completely tanked and talked so much that I felt exhausted. I also felt
terrible that I had come all the way to a middle of nowhere village, Fuzhou
China, to make a contribution and completely bombed. In the teachers meeting
following the first day of class I looked at the faces of the other five
individuals that had come from America and nobody said a word. Sitting in silence
we all had the same home-sick face with a defeated expression.
It took every ounce of arrogance that I had to convince myself that I
had what it took to go in for day two. It was in the first hour that me and
forty Chinese students bonded through the game of Bingo. It was the first
thing that I had ever taught in a classroom and I was thanking the powers that be
that I had picked up the game in Wal-mart before I left for $3.98. It was a
small accomplishment that felt like a huge achievement. Bingo has been
conquered, now what? From there it opened up communication between me and my
students. It was the first step of my journey to loving a culture that had
looked so cold to me just the day before.
In my first week in Fuzhou, in addition to their studies, my students
had learned American classics such as hangman, monopoly, poker, and I-spy. I
had bonded with the individuals in front of me but not their culture or the
land that I now lived in. I had a roach infested apartment during a bad flood
season, periods without electricity, no air condition, no cell phone, and no
vehicle. I walked miles every day and on one particular day I was in a bus
during a nearing Typhoon. I discovered how truly poor it feels to be out of
the eye of a main land that matters economically and how much money matters.
This village is overlooked by most people for being such a broke land and the
people would be seen as unkept by appearance driven individuals.
Fuzhou was the best-worst time I ever had. I walked around with a wonder
glow, and I was ecstatic. The quality of my students classes were
directly relevant to my happiness, and these people mattered to me. Out of a
mutual obligation and commitment everyday we showed up to learn more about each
other. They learned more about American universities, Live AID, and the
democratic way of life. They taught me how to cook after classes. I could tell I
was making a change and for the first time I was doing something on a grand
scale that contributed to more than myself. It was in that week that me and
forty individuals developed a mutual adoration. I shared snickers bars that
I had brought from America and they showed me around. Fuzhou became this
place that signified friendship. This place was familiar to me and reminded me
of New York City. At first to outsiders its scary, unfamiliar, and sometimes
quite cold. Upon spending time there you learn that there is a pedigree of
people that are unique, loving, and unlike anywhere else.
Over time I got over all of the things that I didn't have in Fuzhou. In
the beginning all I could think about is not having a hair dryer or indoor
plumbing. As the days went on I saw my students forced to leave school every
now and then to work so their family could have enough food. This was normal,
expected, and simply the way of life. What outwardly appears to be a cold
culture is both lovely and affectionate in a very non western way. Instead of
hugging and smiling to show affection you do what needs to be done for one
another. When one person struggles you do not speak of it but pick up the
slack and provide. This is such a beautiful thing. It makes you think about
all of the times that you say thank you. How many of those times do you just
let your action thank someone? How much easier is it to hug a parent than to
sacrifice some time for them?
A few days before my return to America I want hiking in the mountains
with 15 of my students. The mountain was beautiful because everything that is
consumed by the inhabitants come directly from the mountain. I drank teas
from the herbs that grew and ate fish that swam in the water. The only
transportation up or down is your own two feet and the only way across the water is
to swim. The mountain and the way of life requires you to rely on your
person to get where you need to go. There are so many of the unnecessary things
in life that is omitted in Fuzhou China. In a place with little economic
prosperity I found that there is much prosperity and a willingness to learn. In
fact, much more prosperity than I often see with those that have everything,
and have done nothing for it.
There is a rare appreciation that exists in Fuzhou which is
unexplainable to anyone who has never experienced it. The best way to begin to
understand the way of life there is to equate it to a loving grandmother that
selflessly gives of everything that she has. People do not expect reciprocation for
their efforts. The kindnesses that are exchanged between strangers are just
as lovely as the kindnesses exchanged among friends. While in Fuzhou I
realized that everything does not translate between cultures and I came to the
certain conclusion that sometimes it just doesn't matter. There are some
constants in life. People love, and respect, and are kind. I could be naive but
I am convinced that across the world you can find a home just as friendly as
your own if you are open to finding it. This is how me and these forty
strangers became friends. It is my closest semblance of how people behave in an
almost utopian society. Fuzhou is a paradise that few explore but it is a
land wide open to exploration should you want to delve out of the familiar.
